Deeper Then Ever (Humanstuck!)
by rainygirl111
Summary: Humanstuck Fanfiction based loosely off canon events. Feferi and Eridan have been both been having nightmares since they last saw each other. When they find each other again, will things change? Or will things just become worse between the two? (This is the main plot, but there will be others stories in this too!)
1. Chapter 1:Eridan

Feferi stood there, focused on the the patterns on the wall, the elaborate swirls, and miniature seahorses . The light purple mending nicely with the charcoal grays that stained the walls. Her fingers brushed lightly against the wall, her whole body becoming light and weak, fragile and ready to crack when touched. Like she was made of paper, and her bones were made of fine china. She turned her head slowly to the sound of an opening door, a man stood there. His chiseled features, and his stoic expression, he looked at her warmly. It had been a long time since he had last seen those beautiful green eyes, since he heard her voice, the voice that sounded like a million chiming little bells. He needed her, he knew that he needed to hold her close and whisper to her all her fears away..everything that she ever worried about. He wanted to take that all away from her, and as he walked closer and closer he body got colder and colder. She choked back a sob, looking up at him one lone tear falling down her cheek "Er-Eridan" She stuttered, as she fell to the ground, lifeless and cold, fragile and breathless. With that Eridan whispered words of regret and sorrow, as he picked up her limp body holding her close to him. "Feferi..no please no" He looked down at her his eyes filling with tears, spilling onto his cheeks, clutching her close never wanting to let her go.

He wakes up panting, his heart beating trying to escape his chest and run away into the night, his fingers clenched tightly around the lavender fabric, his toes curled tightly, chills running through him. Shaking and shivering and just feeling pure discomfort. His dreams had become worse, his memories soaking into them slightly only making them more bonechilling, bringing him more discomfort, more sadness. Tears streaked his cheeks as he sat there trying to even out his breath, practically feeling like he could just die then and there. He was finally able to draw back the covers and take one step onto the cold floor, a shock of cold rushing through him as he made his way out of the comfortable confines of his bed.

His feet padded the floor as he made his way to the bathroom on the opposite side of the seemingly vacant apartment. He was the only one living in it, and it was barely furnished enough to be considered a place to call home. But then again to Eridan it wasn't home, it was just another temporary place to live, just a barren shell of a home called a house or in his case an apartment building. He lived right inside of the tallest complex in New York, the level before the top level and seven levels above the bottom, he felt like he had his own little castle, but really it was only a maiden's chamber. He walked into the bathroom, twisting the faucets so they emitted warm water, he rubbed at his eyes. His sleepy expression stared back at him in the mirror, a small sharp smile that had been turned into stressed, creased frown throughout the years. He was never really happy, only just floating on the waters beneath him, drowning slowly as he kicked his feet to keep afloat.

He ran his hands through his hair, messily styling it and threw a shirt on over his slender torso. He sighed, squeezing himself into skinny jeans and slipping into a pair of boots. The coat that hung on the hook wrapped warmly around him, his scarf positioned nicely around his neck and his glasses perched lightly on his nose. He smiled, it was fake as the food they show on commercials but a fake smile was good enough to boost up the cheer meter, since it was practically an empty tube of despair. He sighed and exited the building, as he walked along the crowded streets of New York City, his hands in his pockets and the chill creeping up on him as he slowly headed towards a cafe where he would be able to sit and eat in the peace and quiet of dimmed lights and black coffee.


	2. Chapter 2:Feferi

She lay in his arms, his hands caressing her unruly curls, her eyes closed laying on his shoulder. He was whispering sweet words in her ears, and rubbing small circles on her back. She felt relaxed, needed and cared for. Like she was wanted by someone, two hearts mended into one, two hands holding the same fate. Two smiles on their lips, two souls being comforted together. The words left his mouth coming out light and soft

"I love you so much Fef" Yet she couldn't return those words, those feelings, those ways of thinking. They just weren't there. Her friend of years was now telling her how he felt and yet she couldn't say anything important, anything good. She just shook her head and looked back at another boy. A tall boy, with different colored eyes, and a smug grin on his face. She pushed one away, and ran towards the other.

She ran like there was no turning back, like someone was chasing her, like she was finally let loose from the reins that had kept her stationed in one place for so long. She ran into two boney arms, and nestled herself into the bare chest of Sollux, his hands running through her hair, keeping her safe, making her warm. Eridan turning away defeated, lost and broken as he took one look back and didn't stop walking until he was out of her sight. Then all of a sudden the sound of glass shattering against the ground sounded in her ears, her heart perked up and Sollux's disintegrated in her arms, falling out of her grasp and all over the barren ground. No words could comprehend what happened but she scooped up the remnants screaming his name over and over searching for an answer, anything to stop the anguish that came over her.

A scream escaped the young girl's mouth, as she shot up from her dead sleep looking about the room. Nothing was wrong, everything was fine. The sound of the shower stopping alerted her that he had just gotten done. Her boyfriend of two years walked out, his matted black hair, wet and sticking to his face. His colored eyes hidden underneath, droplets rolling down his torso and back like constant sweat. Yellow boxers on his bottom half, small and cheap looking. Feferi couldn't help but giggle at the sight as she rolled out of bed. She looked at the clock, it read six thirty-four. Six thirty-four? Oh god she was going to be late, she rushed around the room, there was no time for a shower and she barely had time to do anything but get dressed and go. She brushed her hair quickly, the thick red locks hard to manage and even harder to get through with the fine bristles. She wiggled into a pair of jeans that were laying on the floor, and placed the light pink shirt on. She smiled and waved to her boyfriend as she slipped on her shoes and headed out the door.

She ran down and into something hard, or someone. She looked up at the other woman, who looked down at her with worry and confusion, she gave out a small pale hand.  
"I'm terribly sorry..do forgive me"

Feferi just smiled and nodded, giving her a quick nod before racing past her and towards the double glass doors.

She felt a grip on her shoulder and turned around "My name is Aradia by the way" The other girl smiled and gave her a wave. Feferi didn't no what to do, she felt like there was something familiar about this girl.

"Do you live here?"

The girl shook her head and laughed lightly "Im here to visit my boyfriend Sollux" Feferi's heart exploded at those words, she managed to stutter out the words

"Te-tell him I hate his filthy guts." She ran out the door and to the streets, running down the sidewalks and making it to her job just in time, grabbing an apron and signing in she walked over to the counter and sat behind there looking at the marble ingrains that covered the countertop.

A bell chimed as she looked up to see her first customer of the day. His brown hair done in an updo, and his pale blue scarf hung around his neck. That scarf..she made that scarf and gave it to one person for his birthday..could this actually be that person? She hadn't seen Eridan Ampora in over three years, they were at the prime of their life, Eridan had told her his feelings and she rejected him and went out with Sollux instead, after that they just kind of drifted apart and their hearts slowly formed a new wound. She brushed some hair behind her ear, as he walked to the front, pale blue eyes focused on his shoes.

"I wuh-will have a black coffee please" He looked up, handing her a dollar, when he stopped short and stared at her, just looking into her hazel eyes. It couldn't really be her? It couldn't really be him?

"That will be just a moment Erifin" She giggled lightly at her old pun and realized how stupid It probably sounded but to the man's ears it was pure music.


	3. Chapter 3

Eridan looked at the girl shocked. "Fef?"

The girl behind the counter nods and gives him a soft smile.

He looked like he had seen a ghost. "It has been such a long time..how's life?" He wondered how she was doing, what her life had been like since he last saw her. Was she still with Sollux or had she found someone new? How did she end up with such a low key job? It was just so surprising to see her after two years, it was like it was a drastic change even though it wasn't that long ago.

Feferi looked at him with the faintest of smiles

"When I left you..I never truly forgave myself. My life kind of took a turn for the worst, I wanted to go to college but Sollux told me it wasn't worth it and so I listened, now I'm here at a small coffee shop working for minimum wage and the worst part is he's been cheating on me"

Eridan's face fell, and his fists started to clench, gritting his teeth.

"You got to be fucking kidding me!"

Feferi cowered back sliding him the coffee. "Nope..it's the truth."

Eridan's heart felt like it dropped lower then it had ever been. She had been going through a lot, not to say that he hadn't been going through hell either. When she left he had turned away from the outside world and his father is still helping him pay his expenses. He sighed looking down at the coffee, it was a black hole just like the place his heart used to be.

He still remembered that day like it was yesterday, he still couldn't believe two years had passed since he last spoke to her. He looked out the window, cars rushed past, people socialized and businessmen rushed down the crowded streets. He sipped at the strong tasting liquid and grimaced. This was absolutely disgusting..why did he order this in the first place? He hated black coffee...he hated lots of things. He hated that he was Eridan Ampora. He hated his life, he hated the people in his life. He hated everything.

_His phone signaled that someone was texting him, he looked over at it. It was Feferi, he smiled and looked at the message_

_")(ey we s)(ould talk ..it's sort of important."_

_Eridan thought about this, maybe she wanted to talk to him about the same thing he was thinking of talking to her about. He smiled softly and texted her back._

_"Can we meet for dinner tonight maybe?"_

_He waited for a response silently staring at the screen longingly. The phone vibrated in his hands, and he opened the message._

_"Sure..it's just we really need to talk" He nods smiling, and texts her again his fingers rapidly tapping at the screen_

_"K. See you then" He looks at his attire, and realizes he's still in his pajamas. His white wife beater, and purple pajama pants. He yawns running his hands through his hair, and walking over to the mirror staring at himself. Could Feferi possibly see him in the light he saw her...? He hoped so. He walked over to his dresser, putting on a black button down, purple bowtie, grey jeans and his purple converse. He brushes his hair and puts on his glasses. A couple of hours later, he knocks on Feferi's door. She answers the door giving him a small smile._

_She looked stunning, she always looked stunning. Her red hair was pulled into a bun, she wore a fushchia dress, and little black pumps. They drove to the restaurant, and sat down at the booth they were given. They ordered their food and then Eridan looked at her. "So wuh-what did you want to talk about Fef?"_

His heart beat fast, and he looked at her longingly. He could see that she was becoming reluctant to talk, and he looked at her confused. "Fef?"

She sighed looking into his eyes. "I think we should not be such close friends anymore, go our separate ways you know?"

Eridan could of swore he heard his heart drop to the bottom of his chest. "Wuh-what Fef..that's not wuh-wanted..I was actually hoping we could be more then friends."

Feferi looked up at him, tears in her eyes. "Don't make this harder then it's supposed to be!" She sighs and jumps up from her seat, running out the doors. Eridan got up slowly and composed himself, getting into his car and looking for Feferi seeing her with Sollux..his heart it completely shattered at the sight. His heart was never really the same after that, and Feferi never really talked to him again after that and when she tried he turned the other cheek. He didn't want to talk to her..she had chosen Sol over him and that was final. He went home that night and cried himself to sleep, oh how much he wanted her back. .

He looked up at Fef who was waving a hand in his face. She had been trying to catch his attention and he had been completely caught up in the past. He looked at her. "What did you need?"

She looked away a bit, staring at the ground. Eridan wouldn't want to talk to her, not after all of the pain she had put him through. "I just wanted to talk honestly"

Eridan sighed looking at her. He wanted to talk to her, of course he did. He had so much apologizing to do, so much to talk to her about, so many questions, just a lot of catching up to do. He nodded and motioned for her to sit down.

She laughed a bit "I'm working..but can we talk later..maybe I can come over your place?"

He gave her a smile and nodded. "Sure" He grabbed a napkin writing down his address and number.

She smiled placing it in her pocket."See you then Eri!" She went back behind the counter to assist some more customers, she had a job to do and he had sorrows to drink away with the coffee sitting in his hands. But he didn't he threw away the cup, walking out his heart lifting up slightly. It had been so long, and maybe he would finally be able to rekindle the friendship he once had.


End file.
